the new way it is

Since becoming a mom, I've been downright awful at blogging.  Most would say that's normal, but it bothers me that I haven't kept up on it.  Sometimes when driving to or from work I get an idea for a post, but usually it disappears and my job continues when I get home and nothing ever gets written.  I am going to try to get back into the swing of writing, but since I've said that before, I really can't promise anything!

I've been thinking about our life now, and how even though it's so different, it also feels like it's been this way forever.  Maybe because we are settled into our new routines with Ephraim's schedule, work, and other commitments, but some days it feels like we've been at this parenting thing for longer than 5 1/2 months.  Other days though, I have flashbacks to how life was before when it was Col and I.  I wonder how I didn't get a million more things done.  I wonder how we spent our time.  And then I remember that in this new life, we have had to let some things wait for a while (ahem, blogging...but also cleaning, watching our TV shows [we have yet to start this season's Amazing Race], and seeing friends as often).  It's amazing how life can shift, some parts slightly, others majorly, and yet settle into the same familiar pattern.  

These days I struggle with a new balance.  One of finding time and energy to devote to what is important.  So even though I love my blog, cleaning (yes, yes I do), and reading, these things have had to take a backseat.  But I remind myself that it's ok, because as I'm already experiencing, time goes by way too fast.  The tiny baby boy who we first held in our arms is long gone, and before long this stage of his life will be too.  I already miss those days when he could fit easily in my one arm.  I already forgot what it was like to have to feed him every 3 hours.  And I know that when it was happening, I wished for him to be older, for sleep.  And now I'm here, still wishing for an uninterrupted night's sleep because our big eater won't let go of that one feeding, but knowing that I'll miss the chance to hold my babe in the calm of the night and see his sweet smile when all is dark and quiet.

In the blink of an eye we have an almost 17 lb., 5 1/2 month old who eats cereal, veggies, and fruit like a champ, is pretty much sitting, loves to stand, and has a wonderfully happy personality.  He wants to be moving and active.  He's already been on prescriptions, and had colds, and is trying to break through teeth.  We've flown through diaper sizes and packed away clothes and newborn items.  And time won't slow down.  So I'm trying to teach myself that even though it's hard sometimes to let them go, the dishes and laundry can wait.  Sleep will come eventually.  I need to cherish the hours I have with our guy before he's a big ol' teenager who won't want to sing silly songs, get tickled, and laugh at mommy and daddy's crazy faces (although maybe he'll still laugh at us).