Thanksgiving 2013

Happy Thanksgiving!  This year we spent the day at my parents' house with my mom's side of the family.  Mendon did a great job staying in the living room while we ate (new training we are teaching her), and we had a great time catching up and eating lots.  We got to facetime with Zack which was also fun and amusing as always!  He and Kristyn were making their own Thanksgiving feast.  The big difference?  It was barely 30 here while their temperatures were in the 70's.  They were thinking of going to the beach!  That evening we went to my grandma's and relaxed with my dad's side of the family.

Friday I slept almost 12 hours (a huge rarity for me), and we went out in search of a new dishwasher (ours has been dead for many months).  We only had to visit a few places and found a great deal on a better model than we would normally get.  It included delivery, installation, take-away of old dishwasher, and no tax!  I was so excited when we left the store.  Guess I'm a real grown-up now since I am excited about a new dishwasher!  We spent the evening with Col's family and had our own Thanksgiving celebration, eating more good food and enjoying each others' company.

Even though Thanksgiving was much different than we anticipated it being and we weren't enjoying a newborn, we still had a great time.  This year, I am thankful for the love and unending support of our families and friends.  I am thankful for my husband, who keeps me strong and enjoying life.  I am thankful for the beautiful house we bought and our cute, lovable dog we adopted, both this year.  As always, we are blessed.

baby showers : part 2

Family Shower 11.3.13

baby showers : part 1

Community Group Shower 10.5.13

Work Shower 10.15.13 

(I missed the boat on taking a decent amount of pictures)

savoring the little things

A few days ago, I had a moment of gratitude for our little life.  You know when you are doing something so simple, yet feel overwhelmingly blessed and content where you are?  It was like that.

Over the last few weeks we have enjoyed a lot.  One Friday we had a 24-hour movie marathon with our friends Rachel and Brenton where we kicked off with a late dinner at Moe's (our first time!), and then stayed up until 4am eating ice cream, candy, and popcorn while watching Thor, The Hulk, and Captain America.  When we got up the next morning, we commenced with pancakes and Iron Man.  Later that evening, after a quick trip to the vet with Mendon, we finished off with The Avengers.

On Sunday of that weekend I was able to meet my parents at the mall and enjoy an extremely entertaining shopping trip with them.  My dad had to get some new clothes, and I had a blast laughing and being goofy with them.  Later that day I hung out with Teenie and Jeremiah, where we talked and played and I had fun getting carrots spit up on me a few times ;) One night after work, I was able to meet Rach for coffee and have a great conversation with her about our adoption and catch up on life and her new puppy.  We went to my parents' house one Saturday night and celebrated my Grandma Saile's birthday with my dad's family.  I had a phone catch-up with Deanna and cherished the fact that even though we had to call each other back a few times during our conversation, we can always pick up right where we leave off.

I even finally started my promotion at work, the one offered me in July.  I have one week under my belt, a small corner desk with a window to look out of, and quiet to think and work.  I have a lot to learn, but so far I'm happy where I am and excited to keep accomplishing.

Col and I have taken a ton of walks with Mendon, many during the cold fall air, all bundled up.  We have traveled new routes and walked long distances (the other day we took a 2 hour walk).  One night, we even walked to our polling place to cast our vote for a local election.  It was that night that I felt content, something that is hard for me sometimes because I get caught up in making plans, lists, and timelines.  We have relaxed at home, watched football and lots of Friends episodes, spent time with family and friends, eaten like crap and enjoyed too many desserts.  After the heartache that we have felt (and the hard days I still have), it has been refreshing to just enjoy the little things.  To really be in the moment for once.  And no matter what happens, we still need to enjoy our lives as they are, right then.

[learning to] move forward

A couple weeks ago we took some time to update our nursery picture in our adoption profile and mailed our profiles back out to the agency.  Especially now, after being so close, we know we are ready to have a baby and want to keep moving forward.  I still think about that sweet little girl that we were so close to meeting, but I know that she is safe with her mom.  Will I ever forget her?  No.  But I do know that she is ok; we are ok.  And I know that God knows why, for whatever reason, she wasn't meant to be our daughter.  If nothing else, we have learned that our hearts have the capacity to continue to love and hope.

When we sent everything back in, I realized I'm kind of bummed to be back in the profiling process.  Even though we only did it for a couple of months, I didn't realize how draining it was.  It was so relieving to be matched and into the next step, where we didn't have to be glued to our phones waiting for calls.  Only after, now that we are back in the pool, I have to once again get used to having my phone with me at all times, anticipating each call, taking in a lot of information, and deciding whether to be profiled or not.  And I do wonder what it will be like getting that first profiling call again.  Will we have the same excitement, or will we be more wary throughout the process this time?

And so, while we are prepared to wait again, I am trying to once again savor and enjoy the time that we have together as a married couple.  To give up my timeline and thoughts of what life would be like right now and instead embrace the fact that it will change soon enough.  Looking at our beautiful nursery, all of our cute baby gear, I can't wait to use it.  I can't wait for the day when Little L is placed in our arms forever.  When I can sneak in and watch him or her sleeping.  I just can't wait.

That's where we are at.  Moving forward in hope, with faith.  Please pray for us as we continue on!